Just Another DAy

Ah what did i do today that is so special that i have to blog about? lol...NOTHING!! thats the thing... As usual i woke up, washed up, went down, walked the dog, cleaned up his mess, mop the whole of downstairs, made breakfast ( oo yea i did make breakfast), then watched tv till my mom came back... Then went to the ENT (ear,nose, throat) doc and got a second opinion on my lump...

Went in and found a friendly looking doc there...All smiley and stuff...made me comfortable...Then he started checking the lump...Ask me to go into another room and da da daaaan the same procedure!!! Sticking a long tube into my nose!! I was hoping i did not have to do that since i did it last time but Nooooo..I had too... SO i laid on the bed and he stuffed the tube right into my nose!! Yuck and ouch!!! and into my throat!! gag and yuck!! Then its done....haih...

Im fine...the lump may be due to infection...an operation is not necessary yet... I just have to monitor it if it gets bigger then the operation is needed so far I can just let it be...Yay!!

So then went to Jusco to shape my eyebrows lol and then to cut my hair...I hate that hairdresser! Firstly she never cuts the style i want to, Secondly she is so inconsistent!! Now my hair is too short and thin!!! Like i needed that...haih..i really need to change my hairdresser!! But the hair wash was relaxing!! I needed that...

Hm then in summary, posters ( ooo i did 5!! and im proud of it) btw its a favor that im doing for my friends for this competition on NIE...so campaign thingy and they needed posters...oh then dinner,dishes, pasar malam,friends, online and prob more friends and then bedtime...lol

Isn't this interesting...*grins sarcastically* wooohoo cant wait for tmrw...=)
*hugz and kisses*

Eek!! An operation?!!

Haih just about a year back, I found a lump slightly below my right ear and it has been growing since...Now it is the size of a small fishball and it is quite visible...Parents did take me to see a speacialist and she gave me some med but said it was nothing dangerous, and some people do have them due to sinus or some infection which cost bateria to disturb the lymph nodes and stuff le...

So anyhow the story sorta ended, but then recently my mom realised it got bigger and started to get more worried when she was at the salon and people were talking about it.. It seems this kinda cases are common but the people just go for the operation to remove it just to be on the save side so knowing her believing everything she hears insist that i go for an operation now...eek!!! I hate hospitals!! The thought of an operation is making me sick...But funny im not really worried about the operation or whether the lump is anything harmful or not ( for i did not go for a scan yet) what scares me more is staying alone in the hospital...haih... and then as everyone knows...the hospital bill.... I have insurans but haih u know the shit they put you through le...

I dun wanna i dun wanna!!! argh its ruinin my holidays!!!

Man of Action or Words?

I was browsing through a copy of Elle magazine when I came across an article written by Michelle Bong titled More Than Words. It caught my attention and I would like to add on with my opinions and viewpoints.

The writer started by defining how love is in the modern times for women, most women wants a man of action. One who would sweeps us off our feet by carrying our groceries, and surprising us with romantic dinners and impromptu weekends in Bali. But sometimes, the “all action no talk” style can be detrimental. There is nothing quite like a man who can dig deep, articulate his feelings and speak from the heart, as she says. An articulate man as she defined is one who can move his woman by telling her what she wants to hear and mean it too.

It’s sad to say that most men can’t bring themselves to speak of love, so it’s unfortunate to say that the era of love letters, and dates which consist of moonlit strolls in the park or a shared milkshake is beyond it. Which words would one prefer? “ Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, or a simple “ I luv you” on the sms? Well most would say it’s the delivery that counts. Well I am not taking sides.

In my opinion both are equally important, you can’t have one without the other. Too much of one would also upset the other. Therefore both in good dosage is what a woman needs. Let’s start with a man of action, yes your man would be there to take you out for romantic dinning and shower you with gifts but is a close shell. How is a relationship to work when there is no communication? When I said words I don’t mean words of Shakespeare or corny ones but meaningful words, words from the heart that one actually means. Besides the exchange of words, communication is, like I kept emphasizing is important! Talking about life, what’s going on in one’s life, the family and friends is a part of communication and it is baby steps to a good relationship. It strengthens things more then any gift one can afford to buy. For material things could never replace communication between two loving couples and make up for the lost time between two couples.

But this does not mean action is all bad. Who would not like a man who would take charge once in awhile, who would make the decisions and be there, a strong wall when all seems hopeless? How about a man of words? One which showers you with sweet words, quotes from “Shakespeare” that will bring you back in time where poetry is the way to a woman’s heart. But what if he does not mean it? What if its pure words, a horrible way of wooing the helpless and the desperate? How about a great guy who always plans to take you somewhere but never got to doing it? Promises you things and never fulfilling it? Should have, could have, and would have… things that people promise or would want to do but due to some reasons never get to doing so. To some extent it discourages people and hope looses its meaning. Empty promises would be the word to describe it.

So there you have it the pros and cons of a man of action and a man of words. Like I said before I personally prefer a little bit of both, a man who can communicate with me and tells me what is in his heart, what is he thinking about, be romantic and charming when it is necessary and also a man who would stand up and make decisions, be a man and does what he promises to do.
=P ( Proud to be read)

To Be or Not To Be; That is the question!

Well as you can see in my title and in the words of Hamlet, to be or not to be? To me this is really ambiguous for it really depends on the situation. But right now the only thing that’s for sure in my life is… gosh I have no idea. For many people it would be an easy question to be answered.” I would finish my medical studies and graduate as a doctor/surgeon and live a perfect live with a perfect husband”

As for me, I am currently doing Mass Communication and majoring in Public Relations and am already in my fifth semester and suddenly I find myself getting hit with something…reality… Is this really what I want to be doing? As in Mass Communication? I don’t see myself as a journalist as much as I love the fact that my articles and my thoughts would be published and be read by people.. and I dun really see myself in advertising either… I am not creative! Now how abt public relations? Gosh I have to deal with people… I am actually a naturally shy person when it comes to the first impressions.. I dun usually do well.. In Public Relations one have to be strong-witted, hard headed, confident, up and about and I am still lacking of the above… still the same ole lazing me…

Why the sudden thoughts you may think? Well I have been compared to people continuously in my whole lifetime by my mom… Somehow its never enough for her, my results, my achievements are just acknowledged by a nod and sometimes rewards but my failures will be bombarded with lectures and comparisons to my better off friends and relatives… One day after talking to my friend about how she is leaving soon made me realized that all around me my friends have what you may call high ambitions and high aims in life! In my group of high schoolmates I have 5 studying to be doctors, about 4 going for engineering, one a dentist, one a lawyer this is to sum up how high flying careers they are aiming for and some are already on the track… And then my mom had to make a comment about how when there is a high school reunion and everyone is back to “show off” their achievements and if I am not doing well, would I have the face to show up during the reunion when everyone is doing so well on their own?

The thing is I don’t see myself as a doctor nor a lawyer nor an engineer. I am not too sure what I want but Mass Comm seems the best choice rite now. The closest to what might be my interest but my mom doesn’t seem to see it and till now I can see that she still disapproves it and hope that I do something better… She is dampening my spirits plus after talking to a cousin of mine who is also doing Mass Comm, she majored in Public Relations then opt to Journalism and now she is doing her industrial training for VIDA and a few of her articles are being published in the mag, she have seen celebs, been to launches, basically been there done that and I wonder to myself would I be doing that? Can I do that?? Am I capable of it? Well not the writing part but being out there and doing what a Mass Commer should do.. But if it is not Mass Comm then what else?!

I feel so lost right now.. I am one who wants it big, a high flying career, independent, and enjoying the fruits of my labor but looking at my slacking self rite now I am doubting it. My mom keeps on saying how I don’t aim higher then what I have right now I seem to be happy with my I have but I am actually not. Only at moments like this do I have a sudden burst of inspiration to do way better to aim for the stars and pull myself together but after I switch off this com it goes back to slacking and when college reopens, studying last minute… going out too often, last minute work…gosh!!
I am really lost and I really don’t know what to do with my life!!

As my title says and so does Hamlet ‘to be a Mass Commer or not to be; that is the question!’

My future is but a thick fog; uncertain..a wrong move and it would be detrimental, a right one and I’ll be satisfied…

(Proud to be read)